I cannot yet decide if this is writer's block--an inability or unwillingness to develop an idea--or an instinctive, reflexive movement towards shorter forms.
Each of these short poems seem to be complete. But part of my brain keeps saying "This is not what you set out to write--it's too small to be of any substance; say more! Say more!"
Here are two. You decide--are they done? Or are they abandoned and incomplete?I'd love a little feedback on this one...
I Do Not Love You
i do not love you
for your smile but
for how it glows and fades
and glows again, a soft parade
of private joys that change
with the seasons, with the light of day.
Sunrise Again
funny how the world
continues to turn. for all
our struggles and sorrows
imagined and real
we have not stopped it yet.
the sun rises; the sun sets.
we each experience it in our own way
but it is the same sun every time.
2 comments:
Great work Mr. Shea!
-Steve Bernardi.
They're short and sweet. Although I like them they're certainly not your best work. I don't believe their lacking to be due to length though. They're small and pretty like the things they describe. They're describing some interesting feelings and ideas but not anything extremely passionate or heart-rendingly conflicting; not that all poetry has to be like that. Their just nice. I think any artist has to make some just nice pieces between their better pieces. Still blows most of my side work out of the water. Good luck with your struggles.
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